The silent exit: A signal digital businesses should never ignore

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A senior manager takes two prospective clients to lunch. The conversation flows easily, and the meeting feels promising. When the bill arrives, he confidently hands over his payment card. The transaction fails. He tries again. It fails again. The waiter waits. The clients watch. Eventually, one of the invited guests quietly pays the bill.

No complaint is raised. No scene is made. But something breaks in that moment. Confidence is dented. Trust is embarrassed. And the relationship never quite recovers. Worse still, nobody from his bank calls him proactively to support the failing transactions.

The question is, is there someone monitoring such real-time customer moments and reaching out to help?  This experience is repeated every day in different scenarios. Someone goes to order an online service and the system is temporarily unavailable. A customer makes an online purchase, but what is advertised and what is delivered are worlds apart in terms of quality and value for money.

In many boardrooms, customer dissatisfaction is expected to be reported as loud complaints and escalations, such as calls, angry emails, and social media posts tagging regulators, CEOs, and opinion leaders. These are the signals many executives respond to.

But there is another unseen dimension; the most dangerous customer signal is not noise. It is silent. Most customers rarely complain loudly. They leave quietly. In most cases, they may tell a few close friends about their experience. By the time churn appears on management dashboards, trust is already lost.

Many businesses across multiple sectors have continued to invest and adopt digital distribution and engagement channels. Consequently, they increasingly rely on customer analytics to make decisions. They track registrations, logins, transactions, and average revenue per user. They analyse sentiments from social media engagements. They predict growth and churn using data trends. Yet many still miss the most critical moment in the customer’s journey, the moment when a customer emotionally disengages.

That moment does not happen when a customer cancels a service. It happens when they stop believing the service will stand by them when it matters. Compared to many emerging markets, especially in Africa, Western markets’ complaint culture is direct and forthright. Customers escalate issues quickly, demand compensation, and publicly call out poor service.

But in African markets, the dynamics are different. Complaining carries a social cost. Many customers do not want to jeopardise their relationship with the service provider, because they believe in long-term relationships. When a service fails them at a critical moment, majority do not escalate. They quietly adjust their behavior.

When systems fail during time-sensitive moments — paying school fees, accessing healthcare through self-service devices, sending emergency funds or completing a critical transaction, the experience creates more than inconvenience. It creates fear. Fear of exposure. Fear of loss. Fear of being stranded. Yet fear does not appear on dashboards.

What appears instead is a gradual pattern: Fewer logins and reduced repeat transactions. Management teams often interpret this as a marketing issue, a pricing problem or low digital literacy. More campaigns are launched. More customer education is rolled out.

But the emotional contract has already been broken. This is why churn metrics arrive too late. By the time a customer formally exits, the decision to leave had been made weeks or months before.

The most expensive failures in digital businesses are not the system outages. They are moments of abandonment when customers feel exposed and alone. In societies that believe in relationships, trust is not abstract. It is practical and relational. By the time customers complain or fail to show up, you are already late.

Dr Kiburu is an enthusiast of applied technology for the advancement of society,